It’s May…and for me that means volunteer recruitment season is in full swing.  Having had the lead on multiple ministry positions in the church there is no doubt in my mind that those that recruit volunteers for our weekly children’s and family ministries have the one of the most relationally intense jobs in church ministry.  Even those in a small congregation can find themselves supporting dozens of people as they serve Christ through ministry to children.

The danger with such a relationally intense ministry is that, if we are not very mindful, we can find ourselves empty, tired, and discouraged.  We give and give and give until there is nothing left to give.

So… “Who’s Supporting You?”

http://www.creationswap.com/media/968

If someone or multiple someones haven’t already come to mind your already in trouble.  We can’t do what we do with out having intentional relationship in our lives where we are being supported, encouraged, and mentored.

Below are three key relationships I have found essential to remaining effective as a ministry leader who supports a relationally intense volunteer ministry.

Attend church regularly.  I don’t know how many children’s ministry leaders I have met that can’t recall the last time they attended “big” church.  If that’s you, this has to change.  And right now, as you plan and recruit for the fall, is a great time to make sure that happens.  It is absolutely essential that you spend regular time with your faith community worshipping, learning from God’s Word, and participating in communion together.  If you believe it is essential for others, it has be essential for you as well.

Participate in a Small Group.  You need a group of people that you can hang out with each week, where you can just be you.  Where you can take off your ministry leader hat and put on your follower of Jesus hat.  Where you can be encouraged through the study of God’s Word and prayer.  Where you can be supported and strengthen.

Find a Mentor.  We all need someone who is a little further down the path then we are to help us get to where they are.  In ministry we do this for people all the time, but if we don’t have anyone “up-line” from us, that can be our anchor and support, we put all those who are depending on us at risk.  And I recommend this relationship be more of a spiritual couch then a business couch.  More then we need someone to help us build the right programs…we need someone who helps us make sure our heart is continually surrendered to Jesus.

What are some other relationships/ways you find support in your ministry?

KB

April edition of ‘this month in #kidmin’ where each month we explore the hot topics swirling around the Children’s and Family Ministry world.

Click Here to download Podcast

Links mentioned on the podcast:

SundaySchool.com

The Eric Trap

Kidmin and Culture

sticks.posterous.com

Free Text Service with Twitter

The Bully Project

Orange

Since I first started in ministry Monday’s have always been my Buffer Day.  A buffer day is a day (or even just a few hours) set aside each week to accomplish all those weekly tasks, that if gone unchecked, rob you of your productivity.  You know the stuff I’m talking about…e-mails, calendar planning, cleaning your work space, catching up on phone calls…all those little tasks that sit in the back of your mind and steal mental energy if not completed.  The beauty of a buffer day is that it sets you up to be highly efficient the rest of the week.  It’s a beautiful thing.

One item that I have recently added to my list of buffer-day-tasks is what I call “six-months-out”.  

In ministry it is really easy to get consumed by the day-to-day, week-to-week grind.  And, if we are not careful, we can become so wrapped up in doing that we forget to dream.

Six-Months-Out is all about dreaming.  Whether it is 15 min or 2 hours every Monday I spend some time dreaming about where I want my ministry to be in six months, what steps it is going to take to get there, and who I need to bring along to make it happen.  This simple exercise forces me to start my week off dreaming, reminds me of ministry vision, and pushes me to rethink ministry structures and methods.

What strategies do you use to push yourself to dream of something more for your ministry?

The longer I work with kids the more convinced I become that the foundation of an effective children’s ministry is a strong focus on strengthening and supporting marriages.  Healthy marriages lead to healthy homes and healthy homes provide the secure base kids need for emotional and spiritual health.

I don’t have Barna certified statistics, just years of watching the same story play out over and over again.  Kids that come from homes where there is marital peace and a common since of mission and purpose do well.  They are more confident, they navigate peer pressure more effectively, and they develop a faith that sticks.

We have all heard that statistics that upwards of 70-80 percent of kids leave the church after High School.  For years I have focused on creating solutions to overcome these statistics, only to realize that I have been treating the symptoms and not the underlying problem.  Kids leaving the church is a symptom not a problem.  It’s like putting a Band-Aid over a cut that needs stitches.  It may make the cut look better, but the cut won’t heal right if not given proper care.

I am beginning to see that one of the reasons 70-80 percent of kids leave the church after High School is that upwards of 70-80 percent of marriages in our churches are in trouble.  Parents live at odds with each other, they lack mission and purpose, or they have given up and settled for divorce.

What are your thoughts on how your Children’s and Family Ministry can help strengthen and empower couples?  What are your thoughts on the importance of healthy marriages and the role the church should play?

Over the next couple weeks I will share some initiatives I have been working on in my church community, I would love to hear any thoughts you might have as we seek, together, to raise spiritually healthy kids.

KB

Several months ago I found out that one of my favorite children’s Bibles was being rereleased.  The Toddler’s Bible, written by V. Gilbert Beers, came out in 1992 to great acclaim.  The author, a ministry and publishing veteran, knew that in order to engage the 2-3 year old mind, heart, and eyes that he would have to “become a toddler.“  It worked.

Here are five things I love about this children’s Bible.

1. Brilliant artwork: When you glance at The Toddler’s Bible cover, you’ll immediately be struck by the vivid illustrations created by Claudine Gévry (click here to visit Claudine’s personal website).  These illustrations will quickly draw young readers into the story.

2. Interactive: When you read The Toddler’s Bible aloud, you’ll notice an ebb and flow of interactive language specifically and intentionally written for the 2-3 year old child:

Shhh. Do you see the baby?  This is baby Jesus.

Shhh. Do you see the animals?

Baby Jesus is sleeping in a manger.

- Excerpt from The Toddler’s Bible, Baby Jesus Story

3. Bible references: While each story is written in developmentally appropriate language, the Table of Contents includes the source Scripture passages.  I love it when children’s Bibles do not seek to replace Scripture, but point people to it.

4. Author introduction: I had the privilege of spending some time with the author, who lives about five minutes from my house.  Even though I have spent the better part of the last ten years ministering to kids and families, “Gil” took me to school on toddlers.  His introduction to The Toddler’s Bible is a helpful guide for parents and teachers.

5. Learnings: At the end of The Toddler’s Bible there is an outline of the attributes of God that children learn from immersing themselves in God’s Word.  I love this overt admission that the Bible reveals more than historical events, it tells us who God is.

I’ve spent the last 8 years in full-time ministry.  One of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that ministry is done best in collaboration.  Yet, there have been so many times in ministry that I have pulled away from conspiring with other children’s and family ministry leaders and as a result become far too self-dependent.  However, asking questions and networking with leaders is a great way to spur personal leadership development and grow in ministry.

This is why I’m so excited about Office Hours with Michelle Anthony.

Michelle Anthony, Family Ministry Architect at David C Cook and author of Spiritual Parenting and The Big God Story, is making herself available to you.  You can ask questions, share struggles and victories, gain encouragement and insight, and investigate best practices for spiritual development and family ministry.

Office Hours with Michelle Anthony Schedule:

Complete disclosure: I host Office Hours with Michelle Anthony, but that’s not why it’s a great idea.  There are a few things I love about Office Hours that make it a great resource for children’s and family ministry:

• No cost – Just sign up online, log on, and ask away. What’s not to love about free?
• Collaborative – You will hear questions from other children’s ministry leaders, Sunday school coordinators, and family pastors who are navigating the same ministry issues as you.
• Access – Michelle Anthony is a highly sought after speaker, typically you would have to pay to hear her in a conference setting but now you can access her directly every month.
• Personal – Some of the best ideas in kidmin do not outwardly change the program you run or the curriculum you use; they simply bolster your confidence, spiritual health, and leadership ability.

So check out Office Hours with Michelle Anthony on February 16!

For most of us in the States they are called vacations, but I have always liked the term holiday that our Canadian friends use.  Holiday is so much warmer.  Just saying it makes you feel like you are wrapped in warm blanket in front of crackling fire.  But whether you call them vacations or holidays they are an important part of our spiritual growth that is often overlooked or even neglected.

When we look at the example Jesus set for us, and then look at the schedules of most ministry professionals there is often a sharp contrast.  We glorify ‘busy’.  We wear it as a badge of honor.  I’m guilty.  How about you?

Jesus was not afraid to get away and rest.  He understood that if he didn’t take time to recharge and invest in himself he would lose his effectiveness in ministry.  We need to learn from Jesus in this area.

So over the next couple weeks I want to give you three reasons ‘Holiday’ needs to be part of your ministry development plan in 2012.

#1: Holiday is an Eternal Investment

You don’t have to be a Pastor very long to know that ministry takes its toll on your family.  Ministry requires sacrifice—time, energy, and resources.  And our spouse and children often take the brunt of this sacrifice.  But when we choose to take extended periods of time where we disconnect from our ministry work to be fully present with our family we build up an investment that has eternal rewards.

Even though ministry requires sacrifice from the whole family, it is import to show your family that they come first.  When we choose to take a holiday from our ministry—cell phones off, laptop put away, giving our family 110 percent of our time—we shout with our actions, “You mean more to me then what I do.”

Holiday is an eternal investment in your family.  It’s eternal because the only thing that we can bring with us to the other side is our relationships.  All our stuff is going away—but not our relationships.  Those are eternal.  It often baffles me when I see families choosing to buy a new television or some other new appliance that doesn’t help foster relationships when they could be investing that money in a great holiday for their family.  What’s worse is that buying stuff is often glorified while taking a nice holiday is viewed as ostentatious.

So forget all the critiques and invest your holiday where it will get the greatest return on your dollar…in your family.

May you invest well in 2012.

KB

Jane McGonigal believes there are four factors that make online games like World of Warcraft so engaging:

1. They surround us with people willing to trust them with a world saving mission that is on the verge of what you can achieve but is still achievable.
2. They provide a community of collaborators, that want/need our help and input.
3. They give us a role to play in an epic story.
4. They offer ongoing positive reinforcement.

These factors combined with the achievement of what McGonigal calls the “Epic Win”, “An outcome that is so extraordinarily positive that you had no idea that it was even possible until you achieved it…almost beyond the threshold of imagination and when you get there you are shocked at what you are truly capable of,” provides the foundation for the depth of engagement that online gaming produces.

So when I look at McGonigal’s research and I look at the early church, there’s no wonder why the church grew so rapidly in those early days.  Read over that list again.  Then re-read the Gospels.  Is that not what Jesus offered his disciples?  Is that not the path of discipleship?

I think it’s time to redeem gaming.  Instead of using games as a way to escape from real world suffering, we need to use games to inspire people to solve real-world problems.

It’s easy for us to look down at gamers for spending so much time in a virtual world solving virtual problem.  But maybe the blame lies with us…for making an individualistic, mission-less, passion-less, story-less reality.

Instead of looking down at gamers, maybe it’s time to create world-changing games that help people tell a better story.

I’ll share one way we plan on doing this next Friday.

What’s your story?

KB

This past week I got an e-mail from ‘Dynamic Church Trends’ talking about gift-giving and the Law of Diminishing Returns:

“You see it every Christmas. The kids tear into a stack of gifts that usually represents a great deal of sacrifice on someone’s part. They may (or may not) display excitement for a brief moment, toss the gift aside and grab for the next one. Then comes the dreaded moment: ‘Is that all?’

The Law of Diminishing Returns states that there is a point of forward movement that begins to deliver a decline in the desired outcome. Your desired outcome for enduring the Christmas craze is seeing your children’s excitement, joy and gratitude. It’s easy to believe that fulfilling as many wishes as possible will deliver those outcomes, but all too often, it doesn’t. Where is the point of diminishing return?”

While the diagram on the left is true for gift-giving…could it also be true for our ministries as well?  Could it be that a few highly effective ministries create excitement, while a too many creates apathy?  Is their a point at which our desire to provide engaging ministries actually moves families past appreciation to entitlement?

What are your thoughts?

KB

I love the Christmas season.  Not because of the presents or the hype or even Santa, but because it is an incredible time to remember.  Remembering is a lost art in our culture.  And while the world tries it’s best to distract us, it is important to intentionally set aside times in our calendars to remember.

A few weeks ago Rhonda Haslett wrote a great article on Changing Lives & Bringing Families Closer Through Advent.  Growing up my church and family didn’t celebrate Advent, so it wasn’t until a few years ago, when we decided to introduce the idea to our congregation, that I experienced Advent for the first time.  Since then it has become one of our tradition.

Every year we pick a different theme and provide resources for personal and family study.  While we maintain the spirit of the Advent celebration the way that we do it changes every year.  This keeps the focus on remembering and not on activity.  Our tendency as humans is to focus on activity.  But activity doesn’t reorient our hearts, remembering does.

Remembering is important.  If you don’t believe me, reread Exodus and Luke 22.  So we need to be intentional about creating environments that help those in our ministries remember who they are and the story they are a part of.

What things do you do to intentionally help your kids and their families remember? What do you have in place that reminds them of their identity, that reminds them of the story they are a part of?

What’s your story?

KB